I laughed at your last story because in all ways it describes me but the dude and I are married. To share some light on how and why she may be miserable, I don’t know if it’s gonna work for you bruh but it sure did for me.
Bro you need to find out if your woman is holding on to past hurt from her other relationship or if you’re doing stuff her ex used to do that may be making her feel a bit insecure. You should have a heart-to-heart with your woman and try to understand what you can do to not make her miserable or how you can help at forgiving stuff and letting go.
It may look like she is the problem but just maybe she is telling you what’s going on with her but you’re hearing her and not understanding, that was the problem I face he heard me. he listen but he didn’t understand what I needed. The best thing is to try to make an effort to understand and don’t only listen because you care but listen to understand.
Especially if you have hurt her before she just trying to get the reassurance from you that it won’t happen again maybe you holding out on not married may be hurtful Especially if you’re voicing that out to her.
The next best option if that doesn’t work is to pay for therapy for her, she might just be holding on to childhood trauma and don’t know how to deal with it or let it go.
As a big man help your wife to maturity to develop a sensible relationship.
I’m wishing you the best of luck.